If I really think about it, and it really doesn't take that much thought. It easy to realize that my blog has never been politically correct or sterile. In all reality if I keep choosing to lock up my blog and never post except in the rarest circumstance, it will be a mere fragment of my life. Quite frankly I don't want that to by my record. Let alone that this is does no justice to the ideas which I hold.
By the way for those who are feeling quirky, or at least interested in what I've been reading as of late check out the following.
The Abolition of Work (there is an article coming up on this one)
Check out the free downloads for the next 2 books too. Creative Commons FTW
Down and Out in The Magic Kingdom, By Cory Doctorow
Makers, By Cory Doctorow (this is the one I am on right now)
I am giving some serious thought to the possibility of some combination of either a capitalist mixture of a gift economy, or at the very least a way of restructuring the work process. But that will come up later.
Catch you all later
-Alexa
My trip has been postponed indefinitely for a variety of reasons.
- G/F
- Lack of Funds
- Unfortunate family problems
- I am overall needed here right now
I am going to be starting up classes in january if all goes well for massage therapy. It will be a 16 week course and I'll be coming out with a certification that will allow me to practice legally in michigan.
I am hosting an energy work class/workshop/cuddlepile at my apartment monthly. When there are enough people we may start rotating the group so that different people don't have to drive so far every time. If you would like to attend please contact me for details.
Please if you don't see me post here more regularly, feel free to poke at me, as I often have just been forgetting.
TTYAL and awesome if your still reading this ;)
-Alexa
- Location:work
- Mood:
working
For starters a little bit after my last post I managed to get my bike for the most part road worthy and working well. However the immediate day after I finished maintenance I wrecked the poor girl. Fortunately I didn't need hospital time(though I probably chipped a bone or two) and the bike is in repairable condition. I also ended up with a chunk of road rash and plenty of bruises, but in the scheme of things I came out with very little damage.
The quick version of it is I let the clutch out too quickly at a stop when it was raining and dark out and lost traction on some bad pavement. I lost traction and met the pavement a couple times over the course of getting my bike off the road as she wasn't ridable after.
Either way I am hoping to fix her up soon and get riding soon, but all in time.
So off from the topic of the bike. Things with Chrystal have been going rather well. We've been doing rather well for each other and all in all I am in a rather happy place with the relationship. As a a random excerpt, she recently brought me some roses for no reason except just cause, completely out of the blue. I have to admit I probably teared up a little ;), it was rather quite sweet.
On the topic of my trip, I've been preparing as best I can for everything. Money is still rather tight in trying to get ready but its getting better bit by bit. I am still at my job working as a sys admin as Chrystal talked me into staying there through september. It's been both exciting but also stressful getting ready for everything. In reality though Is till feel like this trip is something that is essential as a thing that needs to happen in my life. Even if it is scary as all crapola.
I am still taking request for people who want me to visit while I'm on my way. Unfortunately it's looking like I will probably have to cut the canadian portion of my trip (sorry you guys, I don't have time to rush in a passport it looks like). However things are planned so far for NYC, NJ, MA, GA, FL, and possibly NC. Depending on how things go in Florida I may reroute the trip some time november-decemberish and also drop by and visit the west coast. So Don't assume that just cause your far away I can't visit :).
I've been having some thoughts recently about what contortion is doing in my life, and how much benefit and how much harm it is doing to me. I am also reaching a point that although I love doing performance, I have doubts on how well I would be able to consistently produce my own work and keep things fresh and exciting. I am much more suited to choosing a specific act or skill and working it through to a refined state.
Part of the meanderings of my mind have been that I know that I can't do performance forever, that eventually my body will either break, burn out, or simply for that matter become too old to be aesthetically pleasing in that role. I've been considering and even dabbled a bit into supporting myself with my skills as a psychic. I had some decent results with doing my readings, but I also want to get involved in possibly doing more energy work for people like cleansing area's and healing work. Problem is that gets into a touchy area of asking money for said skills, which overall tends to be frowned on as a practice. Not to mention I am a bit lost on where to even start building a clientelle.
For now though there doesn't seem to be any definite answers. But it will certainly be an adventure for it all to unfurl.
I should also mention that I am going to try posting more pictures up here over time, but we'll see how that goes. For now though I am going to get my ass to bed.
Goodnight everyone
TTYAL
-Alexa
- Mood:
thoughtful
Well this is primarily to serve as a reference to myself.
I went riding today for a little bit and ended up messing up practicing tight curves. (think figure 8's) I didn't drop the bike but I did end up jaming my shoulder pretty good. So I ended up calling it a day a bit earlier than I normally do. Did only about half an hour of riding instead of my hour-2 hours I've been doing.
I decided that I wanted to spend some time taking a look at the health of my bike and see what needs to be done so far and what can be done to clean things up.
I have to say I definitely have my work cut out for me. So far this is my upcoming todo list:
*change oil
*change oil filter
*change fuel filter
*remove fuel tank and finish current inspection (my list will probably double in size after this part)
*replace a decent a couple lines that are showing wear or have paint on them
*reroute carburator hoses and electrical wiring(one of the last owners wired things according to "well this sorta fits" instead of the manufacture design)
*probably replace chain, or at the very least relube
*remove road gunk from massive amounts of the frame and block and probably relube
*relube cluch cable
*check(possibly replace) air filter
*check(possibly replace) spark plugs
somewhere in here I want to eventually also replace the majority of the plastic on my bike as the person who did the old paint job really FUBARed some of the plastic when it comes to where things snap in. So far it doesn't look like the bike as been laid down, or if it was it didn't bend the frame. This is promising. Oh and although the color is fantastic the quality is poor and it looks like they never sanded things down or properly buffed the paint after.
Fairing parts to replace or need work:
replace Rear left fairing (improper installation damage)
replace Rear Right Fairing (improper installation damage)
Paint and install Lower Fairing
Replace upper fairing (looks like someone crunched the fairing at some point)
So anyway, I unfortunately wasn't able to catch the bike mechanics class that is local to here. I'm definitely going to bug some of my mech. savy friends as I visit them through the country, but is there anyone local here that wants to help me work on my bike?
I am just very glad that this is work that needs to be done on a bike and not a car. I get the feeling that parts are going to be a lot more affordable then otherwise would be. Also the majority of the current work that needs to be done isn't part replacement but mostly going through and cleaning things up.
Well thats all for now.
TTYAL
-Alexa
- Location:home
- Mood:
mellow - Music:Nacho Sotomayor - Cafe Del Mar | Powered by Last.fm
I've gone through a lot of crazy these in my life. I mean truly honestly batshit "what the hell" type experiences. I've lost an older sibling at age six walking in on him being dead. I've been in a house raid with AK-47's and AR's all over the place. I've been in a number of serious car crashes without a scratch. I went to nearly as many high schools as years in high school. I have traveled tens of thousands of miles in my life. I have performed on stage, and I've even transcended the lines between gender to follow what I feel was the right route for me.
In all these experiences, of all these crazy things that usually should only occur in books or television I've found that the most exciting and envigorating thing I've come across yet is riding motorcycle. It is truly unique and also probably one of the hardest and scariest things I've ever undertaken. It is sometimes said that no sane man or woman would EVER decide to ride a motorcycle and continue to do it. In all honesty I believe that this is an accurate statement. The choice to ride a motorcycle is -not- a logical one no matter how one defends it.
Yet here I feel a calling to ride one. There is an inherently emotional factor to it. It is extremely dangerous though, regardless of emotional attachment. Thousands of people die every year on a motorcycle, either due to intoxication, error, or otherwise some sort of factor. Getting on a motorcycle and truly being aware of the risk means being aware that you are risking your life.
As I've said though, riding a motorcycle has been one of the most strongly impacting factors on my life to date. It routed a discipline in me that I've very rarely exercised on anything else. I can count the number of times on one hand that I have willingly sat down and studied a piece of literature with everything I had to make sure I assimilated it all. It calls me from being so recluse in my current living arrangement and to step outside and reconnect with nature. It has even been a social equalizer and has made tremendous bounds in balancing my social anxiety and feelings in regards to that. When you have ridden at 45MPH with only a few inches to spare between yourself and the ground, it really puts in perspective the world we live in.
I've heard stories of people going into the armed forces and being transformed by it. Likewise there are many other venues and other experiences people have undergone to experience a similar catharsis and refinement of personality. However I have to say that for me right now riding motorcycle is simply and purely the most "right" thing for me to do that I know.
If nearly any friend of mine walked up to me and asked me if I wanted them to start riding motorcycle, I would look them square in the eye and tell them absolutely not. In the same line of action though, if they still went through it, I would welcome them to the community with open arms as a fellow rider as others have done for me.
I am rambling on now, but if i had to leave with a message it would be if you want to be a rider, do it for you and not a single other person.
/ramble
TTYAL
-Alexa
- Location:home
- Mood: impressed
So here is the quick quick version of whats going on in my life.
*In two weeks I'll be putting in my one month resignation where I currently work
*After much hard work this past weekend I managed to receive my motorcycle endorsement
*on the same note I also purchased my first bike, I'll be putting up a picture of my girl soon.
*I completely broke my bank account for a bit to do the above, but it was so so worth it.(and yes I have proper gear)
*unrelated to bike I have a new g/f officially now. Her name is Chrystal, she is a sweetheart. (for those wondering, It's a poly arrangement)
*My birthday went fantastic earlier thanks to many wonderful friends and Family.
*I updated the firmware on my phone to 3.0.
I think this summarizes my life pretty quickly and well. A few upcoming points
*Might have a performance in august doing a voudeville type thing
*another potential performance at Pagan Pride
*potentially working at Mich Ren Fest this year(hopefully).
*I have two hopeful places to crash during my interim before leaving mid-october. This is good.
*I need to downsize my stuff substantially, people who wish to help contact me.
Thats all for now folks. Maybe I'll quit being lazy soon and actually post something beyond just quick quick summaries.
BTW this is my new bike. <3
Thats all for now
TTYAL
-Alexa
- Location:Work
- Mood: geeky
- Music:David Bowie - Sweet Thing | Powered by Last.fm
That happiness aside, for all those who want to know a snipet of a new addition to my sex life, read ahead.
( OMy It's Evolved )
Hope you all enjoyed ^_~
TTYAL
-Alexa
- Location:home
- Mood: good
My goodness, I think I am actually getting a post in before the full blown 2 week mark. I am going to take that as a sign of improvement and ignore the fact that this is going to just be another monster post.
Work:
Well To be honest things with work have been relatively quiet at work, much to my gratitude. Namely I would attribute it to the fact that my boss has been out of the office this week which has made things substantially more bearable and easy going.
On a spiritual note my modifications to my shields and filters has impacted things in a rather good way. I am able to withstand and deal with a lot more and overall I am holding my boundaries in ways that even a month or two ago I would have had a great deal of difficulty with. One positive thing I have to say about this place is that it’s fantastic for training those shielding muscles.
On a tech oriented note with this, the big change I made was the imagery I was using. Instead of going with the classic new age "colored light" or even using other people’s imagery. Instead I used a more bio/organic view using the shadow stuff that I sometimes see my energy body constructed of, and that made a rather huge difference. (for my geek/energy worker readers, think of it sort of as a combination between venom's symbiot and Alucards shadow stuff from hellsing.... yes I'm a geek what of it? :P)
Gypsy Alexa Tour 2009-???
I've noticed that I haven't made any official record as far as I can tell on LJ of this. Basically I am going to be leaving
At first I'll be doing a solo trip to visit a number of people that I've needed to meet with for quite a while. In addition to this I'll also be doing some side trips to help do some outreach involving the Kherete project. Though that’s still rather quite tentative.
So far states that I'll be visit on the east coast version will be
The travel down time I am giving is about a month to get all the way down to
Psychic Fair
I've been rather pleased with how things have been going with the readings, and I'll probably sign up for at least a few more weekends to do shows. It's been a fantastic training ground and I have also recently started finally making a profit. So quite simply things are looking promising. They started off a bit slow on the first day, but I had a very definite feeling that it was to give me a chance to get use to how everything worked at the fair and know the people.
I will post upcoming fair dates and more info as I confirm them.
WorldCon 2009 dream goes poof
The title is pretty self explanatory. It's looking like making worldcon work isn't really going to happen sadly. I was really looking forward to working with K and seeing what could be made to make a touring group work. There is still a small chance things could change to allow for it to happen. At this very moment though hopes for making it happen at the moment are a bit dim.
So far I've been toying with the idea of working Mich Ren fest this year. I am going to be putting in an application to Pendragons clothing and see if I can get in working with them. Some of the benefits being that it will be good training for working on my presentation skills and they do pay. The downside to this is I wouldn't be able to work the psychic fairs at the same time, but I do think it is a worthwhile trade. As with so many other things right now more news on this is TBA, but looking hopeful on this one.
Romance Update
Things have been rather eventful in this realm of things, and I would be remiss to not mention it. Things with Rhys have gone well, and I've considered pursuing something more serious with her. However I have a lot to sort out with this including the fact that I am leaving state for a decently long time. Although I was originally very cautious about things with her, she has grown on me over time.
As for things with Shiny, she has been rather busy. Though it is good busy it means that I haven't gotten to really talk to her much. This does make me sad, though with luck she'll be back online in another week or two. I would definitely like to hang out again some time, though arranging a meet up just now doesn't seem very feasible for a number of reasons.
Finally and certainly not least K has been rather exceptionally busy. Plus her net has been acting up quite a bit. Things two combined have led to a good deal of distance which has been rather sad. Though I recently had the opportunity to introduce her to Second Life which she was rather quite amused with. It also gave us some much appreciated hang out time. I would definitely like to spend more time with her, but for now I'll take what I can get as she is generally super busy.
Bellybutton Piercing
So I've been giving some serious thought to my next bodymod. So far a bellybutton piercing is on the top of the list of what to get piercing next. What are peoples thoughts on this?(and yes I am doing it for myself, but I also like other peoples thoughts on the matter to help balance out my own views).
Well I think this wraps up this months bi-monthly update, here's hoping that I'll get another post up next week.
Till Then TTYAL
-Alexa
- Location:Work
- Mood: calm
- Music:Anant Jesse
Well either way things are going well for me.
There was a period of time where work was going very poorly and each day was a struggle. However after making some modifications to my shields and acclimating to the work environment I am doing a lot better.
Next big thing I want to mention is that I am going to be doing a series of psychic readings for an upcoming fair.
http://www.michiganpsychicfair.org/
I'll be there on the 14th, 21st, and 28th. All those interested in having me do their readings, come on by. I am going to be charging $30 a reading. Depending on how things go with the readings I may sign up to do a good chunk of the rest of the weekends. My hope is that I can get good enough at doing these that I can get into traveling around doing them and make enough to support myself, We'll see how that goes :).
Other then that its looking that I may be able to afford going to worldcon with K doing readings at the con itself in sort of a vending room set up. But that is still rather tenative, but would be nice to get to see her. I feel sad that see is so far away as I would really love to spend more time with her. I am hoping in time things can go in a direction that are more supportive for her.
There's also two new faces that I've taken interest in as of late. Rys and Shiny(not to be confused with my roommate who was formerly known as Shiny to a group of my friends). Rys and Shiny both have sort of snuck in when I wasn't expecting it and we'll see where things go. So far I get to see Rys a decent amount which is nice. I hadn't really expected things to go the direction they are but at the same time not really going to complain for the companionship.
And well Shiny is just a pretty all around Shiny girl ^_~. She unfortunately lives a bit further away then being able to visit without a bit of decent planning, but both her and her S/O definitely have my interest.
For now that's it. I am going to finish getting ready for the evening and hopefully get a decent amount of rest tonight.
TTYAL
-Alexa
- Location:home
- Mood:
sleepy - Music:Loreena Mcknennitt
For those of you not following me on facebook or twitter I reached the event safely and returned ok.
The sheer number of everything that happened has been rather overhwelming in the best way. Although unfortunately it makes it a bit difficult to summarize properly. So as has been my style with conventions and events where too much has happened to capture it all I am going to try to put together some of the key points.
I am going to go ahead and start this off with my accomplishments that I managed this Gather:
*I didn't explode, not only this, but I actually managed to stay in a semblance of shielded and grounded and maintain my ability to be aware of those around me. This is certainly not finished, but it is by far the best I've done in this ever.
*Connecting to the above post, as a result of being grounded and in control of my senses to a degree I was able to minimize my awkward social accidents. This once again was a monumental change from the past.
*I got cuddles, and not just a little cuddles, but oh my holy god where did all the people come from type cuddles. And it was something that was a near constant whenever I wanted them. In connection to this I seem to have had a hand in them manifesting somehow, but this will take time to experiment with and understand on a more in depth level.
*there are many other points but really I the core of it is I've made a lot of progress energenically and I am happy about this.
Now onto points about the Gather as a whole:
*Consuite was FTW. Seriously there is this girl who is a member of HK who was head of making it into something awesome. Someone give her major props cause she kicked ass this year. I was really happy about it.
*The scheduling was really well done as well. All those involved, y'all kicked ass.
*I have to say I was really impressed with how peaceful this Gather was. Everyone got along really well and as a general rule there was a minimum of drama. Quite amazing.
*The hotel has only gotten better as a pick for the Gather and they're extremely welcoming to everyone and not even reacting to the variety of individuals who attended.
------
I am going to have to cut this post a bit short as I need to get running to the club. However there will be another post coming up with highlight stories. Thanks to all those of you who were there and made this amazing, and those who wanted to be but couldn't make it you were definitely missed and hope to see you next year :).
- Location:Home
- Mood:
sore - Music:Inkubbus Succubus
For those who don't know I am going to be going to the House Kheperu open house (AKA: Gather). I have to say I am rather looking forward to a trip. There are a number of those who I consider some of my closest friends who attend and it will be very nice to see them.
I'll be traveling with
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
sable_twilight with me driving. For those who are wanting to attend and want to carpool or haven't made arrangements let me know. I can take up to 2 more people down with me. I have a rather nice sized trunk so it shouldn't be too cramped either. I think that covers things pretty well when it comes to the Gather.
For those following the whole thing with K, things are going well :). Not a ton of details, just a lot more stabilized in my emotions for her, and feeling more balanced overall. Though I must stay I am still rather quite head over heels for her.
One final note for the sake of record. I am going to be getting trained in motorcycle riding and getting my endorsement in July. I am also trying to gather gear and also want to get my hands on a bike. Any of you out there got some spare armor/bike/etc?
Well anyway I going to get back to work :)
TTYAL
-Alexa
- Location:Work
- Mood: excited
Written 05-09-09
I am currently in the car heading down to Indianna so I unfortunately have no decent net connection to post this. However since I am not the driver right now I figured that I would put in an update and go ahead and post this in.
It's kind of crazy this is the most often that I've posted in months. I wonder if I'll be able to keep up this pace... Maybe it's a sign of the changing season, or just a change of my mood. Hard to tell really.
A friend of mine recently reintroduced me to the sword of truth series. I read it back in high school and absolutely loved the entire series (even if the characters came across as a lttle 2d sometimes). I simply loved how they approach the concept of magic and in general the themes in the story itself. If anyone happens to have a spare copy of the books let me know cause I am looking heh.
K is still in my thoughts a lot right now. I wonder how she is and what kind of things she has seen. Theres a lot I wonder about with her really. I haven't really gotten to talk to her much as I would like but she needs her space. It still leaves me stunned how quickly I care for her, It feels right though, and really thats good enough for me. <3
I wish I wasn't so insecure and scared sometimes. It would be nice to be able to trust that things will work out however they're supposed to and leave it at that.
As a complete tangent my nose ring is -almost- ready to be swapped out. I can feel that its a good amount healed up. It will probably need another week or two to be in good enough shape. I am doing my best to try to just keep patient about it all.
I think I need to go ahead and bring this post to a close. Need to save a bit of battery just in case I need it.
TTYAL
-Alexa
- Location:home
I've found myself having little ambition or energy to do much at work so it mostly has dragged on with a merciless grind.
( Obsessive whiny sappyness below. Approach at your own risk )
I guess what it can be boiled down to is "I care". I feel like I have little outlet for it. but I do, very very much I care.
<3
-Alexa
- Location:home
- Mood:
restless - Music:The Knife - "heart beats"
I occasionally come across individuals who light a spark in me. You could even take a bit of analogy from girl genius on that one if your feeling particularly geeky. They light me on fire, like a torch and I burn. They end up touching my life in such a way to have a profound impact for one reason or another, even if its for the briefest of moments. K is one of those people that just happened to hit me to my core.
I've been feeling the itch of creativity again. That lingering sting and tingle that won't go away till I channel it, funnel it, form and birth it. I find that I am struggling with this muse though. I fight ever so strongly to control it. It is like this raging torrent that I shut down and dam up lest I be taken in by the flood.
I feel my dam breaking, its falling apart as I chizel at its foundation. I am scared of my own creativity but I am even more scared of letting it die away from never letting it see the world. I am fighting my old habits because I ever feel the edge of something amazing that I never quite touch.
I want to say so many things, and they all get lost in the static around me and in me. I am ending up writing a piece of dilute poetry instead of a discourse on the functions of my mind.
For now what I am trying to say in a nutshell. K is special, she touched my heart, my creativity is starting to flow again from that and I am making a point to not fight it this time.
Thats all for now
Clockwork dreams fall into disrepair while the fluid ones flow into life itself.
-Alexa
- Location:work
- Mood: inspired
So life has been rather crazy as of late. As many of you know Penguicon 7.0 was this past weekend. I would be doing the experience I had a substantial injustice to say that it was simply amazing.
I had the opportunity to visit with countless friends who I am close with and had the opportunity to meet some rather fantastic new ones.
As a plug for someones work who I have to say I am rather fond of right now www.etsy.com/shop.php. I bought a rather fantastic necklace from her and you should all check out her work. Right now her stock isn't up from being up at Penguicon, but there will be more soon.
I'll be honest that I don't have the energy or gumption to even attempt to document every single thing that happened. However for what it is worth I will give you some quick snapshots of some of the things that this weekend contained.
*Awkward social momments
*Seducing and being completly seduced
*From the time of walking in the door being pounced by people throughout the entire Con past the ending
*Over 4 spontaneous contortion acts, dozens of pictures and at least half a dozen of pictures(It will be miraculous if I actually see any of them)
*Amazing massages
*Steampunk assimilation
and plenty of other amazing things.
For now I am utterly exhausted so this post is coming to an end. If I find any good media of me later on I'll certainly post them up.
<3
-Alexa
- Location:home
- Mood: content
- 17:53 off to penguicon *squee-* #
- 20:42 At penguicon and oh dear lord this will be a trip. This is huge even for me! O_O #
- 14:01 I have been assimilated by the steampunk. twitpic.com/4f0w9 #
- 19:50 Come on body seriously? When did garlic stop being our friend??! #
- 10:32 Chai tea is my friend #
- 11:47 Wayyy too much energy today.. And it's not the caffiene lol #
- 14:53 Hoping a delivery showed up that I'm waiting on >_> #
- 23:05 Oh god.... I tried second life... It's like crack... I'm so screwed #
- 11:41 *yawn.. Stretch..* today just seems to be dragging out.. >_> #
